You Are the Author
If life is yet to be written
does it mean that
you are the author?
Can it be composed
on a blank slate, such that
no pain occurs?
Then I choose for my story
to be wonderful –
full of joyful times.
No? It’s not happening?
Resigned, then I will write
the realistic life I lead.
My trials are personal –
you don’t share my life
or my pain – it’s mine alone.
You may have a different pain
and in the story of your life,
you are the author.
Julie A. Dickson
Exeter, NH
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Her Mark
I couldn’t drink coffee for years.
The aroma of coffee co-mingled
and conjured the memory of smoke,
her cigarette leaning precariously
on the edge of a blue blown-glass ashtray.
I stared at the glowing tip, waiting
for it to fall, to mar her highly polished table
but no…instinct drove her hand forward
to pluck it up, butt burnt close to the filter.
I watched it go to her lips, bright red –
lipstick left on the filter end,
quickly snuffed out.
My eyes darted to the coffee cup,
half-full of tepid, milky liquid and
Suddenly I realized the rim bore
her mark as well.
As if corrected with a teacher’s red pencil,
I couldn’t bring myself to drink coffee then.
Even now, I can still smell her cigarette.
Julie A. Dickson
Exeter, NH
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Night Out
It wasn’t at all comfortable
sitting atop an old crib mattress
my father had jammed into the back seat.
Too high we sat, heads brushing the ceiling,
my brother stretched out, purposely
pushing his feet into my legs.
The sound emitted from a scratchy speaker;
it hung awkwardly on my father’s car door,
tinny music too loud, dialog too soft.
We had to share popcorn, my brother’s hand
plunging into the box, butter smeared his face.
I ate daintily, despising my greasy fingers.
Two films were shown, after a cartoon short.
That Darn Cat first, we peered over the front seat,
shoulder-to-shoulder, my brother shoving me.
My parents demanded silence and we obeyed,
only the close proximity betrayed our conflict.
Intermission sent a stream of us from cars
Into public restrooms, our sneaker soles tacky
on sticky tiled floors – then running back to cars.
“Take off your shoes”, my mother chided.
Wide awake, we were impossibly required
to settle down as the adult feature began.
We wrestled in twisted blankets, head to toe
on the mattress, straining to see, trying to
follow the movie plot only by the sound track,
slowly relaxing, we gave in to sleep.
I never heard the ending, didn’t feel my father
ease the car out of the crowded drive-in lot,
the ride home, never woke when my mother
carried me in her arms from the car to my bed.
Julie A. Dickson
Exeter, NH
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